Count it all Joy

I believe that pouting is only 'adorable' when seen upon the face of a little child. Otherwise it just isn't cute to look at! I am sure that is what my Heavenly Father was thinking when I flopped down, face first onto my bed less than a week ago. And what made it so terribly ugly is what I mumbled as I did so. "I hate my life." The immediate shame that came over me was more than I could bare and I began to weep.

I don't hate my life. I actually feel that I lead a very fulfilling life with lots of love and laughter. I have a beautiful family, friends that have stood by my side, cheered my on, and love and support me wholeheartedly. Most importantly, My Lord has never given up on me and loves me without condition. What more could I ever ask for?!

You see, I forgot. I forgot to, "Consider it pure joy my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds," James 1:2. I allowed the circumstances of a broken ankle and another painful condition to overwhelm me. To steal my joy. And to feel sorry for myself. There are many, many, many others that are far more worse off then me. I know better.


My prayer to God has been, "Anything". I want to be obedient to whatever He may ask of me. That has not changed. But there is more to the above scripture. Important words that follow. "because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything".

Today I have JOY! I feel it deep down within. Yes, I am broken and flawed. I struggle with aches and pains and deal with ailments that continue to find their way back around. But God is using me. He uses me in ways that I never thought possible. I am learning compassion at a deeper level. I am building relationships in areas that I would have missed if 'healthier'. And it feels amazing. What more could I ask for than this. To be right where He wants me. To be in the Will of God.

"Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God's glory. We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that the help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill us with His love." ~ Romans 5:2-5 NLT